Mom & Pop Culture

A Fixer-Upper with Potential

This morning I was cursing the shower for taking ten minutes to get hot and at the same time cursing myself for thinking that buying a fixer-upper was a good idea at this stage of life. Sure the house has potential, but at that moment, standing in a cold, dark, old, out-dated shower, all I could think was "what the hell did I do?"

A moment later the hot water kicked in, and I was instantly soothed. It was then that I began thinking about the renovation potential of the space around me. I told myself to be patient, and in time I'd have the luxurious master bathroom I desired. It was also then, as the hot water worked its way down my sore, aching limbs, that I had an epiphany:

My new home -- much like my old self -- are both fixer-uppers with great potential.

We both have creaky joints, outdated plumbing, and are a bit saggy around the middle, but with a little overhaul, ongoing maintenance, and a lot of TLC, we might just rise above and allow our true beauty to emerge.

I had to go to L.A. to appreciate NJ

Last week I flew to Los Angeles for a writing conference/pitchfest.  When I told people I was from NJ they immediately recoiled, and got an apologetic look in their eyes. I could only imagine what they were thinking. Eww...you live in a oil refinery along the NJ Turnpike!

Or worse.

Next to Snooki!!

you've got a friend

I have 216 friends. On facebook, that is. In real life...hmm, well, I'm kinda scratching my head and wondering where all my real-life flesh-and-blood friends went. Lately, I can barely get people to respond to e-mail. Everybody's BUSY with their families, their jobs, their busy, complicated, over-extended lives. Everyone's apologizing for why they can't get together and making promises about future engagements we MUST plan -- and secretly know we never will.

Part of the problem is that many of my friends (high school and college chums) just don't live nearby. So it takes time and monumental effort to synchronize our various schedules. Another problem is that so many of us work from home or are home caring for young children. How do we make friends when we often find ourselves isolated and alone? Besides which, you have to work at friendships in order to maintain them, and most of us are already stretched thin. It's almost as if we've become a nation too busy for deep, meaningful, close friendships. And I have a feeling that's why a lot of us are looking for the virtual thing online. If only we'd put down our iPhones and Blackberries long enough, we might realize that there are fascinating people to converse with right across the table from us.

I've been thinking about friendship a lot lately, thanks not only to facebook, but to the documentary film I worked on for three years as an Associate Producer. The BlueBelles is an amazing group of women who met at the YMCA 20 years ago and have been able to forge a deep, and long-lasting friendship. What's their secret? It's simple. They make time for one another. Plus, every Friday they meet for breakfast at a local bagel shop so their members always know where and when to find one another.

the big 4-0

So, yesterday marked the last day of my thirties. As of today -- October 23, 2007 -- I am officially 40.

How the heck did I get here? Where did the last 40 years go?

Everybody tells me that "40 is the new 30," but that doesn't change the fact that I've been alive for 40 years. It also doesn't change the fact that I feel a lot older than I did when I was 30, and that things really do start to wear out over time.

And yet, despite the gray hairs, bad knees, and extra weight -- I do feel young. I'm not ready to give up on my dreams or crawl off quietly into the sunset. At least, not yet.

9.11

I'm glad it was a rainy and miserable Tuesday morning when I woke up today in NJ. If it had been sunny it would have reminded me too much of that other sunny Tuesday morning six years ago when the day started with so much promise -- and then all hell broke loose.

I was actually so busy most of today that I didn't have time until now to reflect on 9/11.  It was a day like any other that changed everything for our country. My kids were 4 and 2 on 9/11/01. I wonder if this war will end before they're in college.

remembering a fellow blogger

It saddens me to announce that one of my fellow bloggers, Adam Finley, was tragically killed last week in accident. I've only been blogging with TV Squad for about nine months and I've never met my fellow bloggers (besides meeting Joel Keller this past week at NYTVF). But still I am profoundly stunned by Adam's death. He was only 30 -- way too young to be gone.

TV Squad is honoring Adam all day by reposting his work. Go ahead and check it out. You will see that Adam truly had a unique voice. Even though he is gone, Adam's words will continue to echo down these virtual hallways into the future. He will be missed.

summer 2007 rants

It's been a while since I ranted about things that annoy me. So here goes.

1. Alli -- Like every other woman in America I want to lose weight (maybe 13 pounds). And I've tried lots of stupid diets in my lifetime. But why in god's name would anyone take a pill like Alli which may cause you to "poop your pants"? No thank you, I think I'll just keep hold onto my love handles and avoid unnecessary public soiling. Of course, it's only a matter of time before Lindsey or Britney or some other Hollywood harlot goes on Alli and public pooping becomes "the hip thing to do."

2. Posh Spice & Beckham-- Stop the hype. Make it go away. She's a fembot (I'm pretty damn sure all of her parts are made in Korea). He's a cute looking soccer player, so what? Am I the only one who wishes these two would stay the hell out of America. They annoy the shit out of me. And I'm tired of hearing about them.

back from houston

Well, I'm back from Houston where my family and I watched Rutgers stomp on Kansas State to win their first ever bowl game.  What an awesome experience.  While we were disappointed that RU didn't get to a BCS bowl (that Orange Bowl should have been ours!) it worked out in the end -- because WE WON and that's all that matters. Of course, I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do for the next eight months, now that I've become addicted to Rutgers football.

the holiday season begins

I need to start ordering my gifts online because the only way I'm hitting shopping malls this time of year -- is with a gun to my head.  Seriously, I get stressed in the parking lots.  There are TRAFFIC JAMS in parking lots!  That is so fricking wrong.

This is not my favorite time of year. It's getting colder. I tend to pack on the pounds with all the holiday celebrating. Work is slow (my writing gets offtrack because of all the holiday distractions).  And of course, I hate the shopping.

Bah, Humbug. Wake me when it's 2007.

#15 rutgers beats #3 louisville

They said it wouldn't happen. What a night! What a game!

And we were there (45 yard line, 6 rows back) with 44,111 others.  Afterwards, we stormed the field with the crowd (almost getting crushed by shoulder-hoisted Jeremy Ito in the process).

True, I thought my husband was crazy when he suggested season tickets last year. But it sure felt great being season ticket holders this year -- we haven't missed a home game. And after 20 years as Rutgers fans, it feels great to have a team that wins -- on national TV!