Lizbeth Finn-Arnold

Dear Olivia,

In a recent open letter to his daughter, the great filmmaker Martin Scorsese spoke about the future of cinema. As you are getting ready to go to college and explore your own options over the next four years, I'd like to talk to you about your dreams and visions for your future, especially your creative visions, and let you know that it will be a tough road ahead. 

The field you've chosen -- communications (tv, radio, film, journalism) is extremely competitive, especially for women.  There are still limited opportunities for women to advance to the upper levels of these fields or be in positions to greenlight projects that speak to women. And thus even if you do advance, you're probably going to have to sacrifice your own creative visions for someone else's (i.e. the man). Working for 'the man' is always an option (and can be quit lucrative I hear), but please know there is no artistic freedom or true spiritual value in making art purely for cash. Paying the bills is one thing. Feeding your soul is another.

Remembering Dad

My father was a monk, an aeronautical engineer, and a poet...an interesting and complex combination for sure that may explain my own fascination with theology, science, and art.

I remember my dad this Father's Day by pulling out an essay I wrote exactly 10 years ago. Not much has changed throughout the years, as I still don't really feel like I knew my father. However, I did become aware that I was protecting my heart for many years, unwilling to risk loss of this magnitude again. Over the last year, I've learned "with love, comes loss". I cannot protect my heart, not if I want to experience life to its fullest. And so, I am learning to open it wide and accept all that comes with it. Even loss.

Losing Elvis

One of my closest companions is dying...and this has made my life of late, not only very difficult, but at times, very sad.

Elvis, my first dog, and without a doubt, the greatest dog, is slipping away before my very eyes and it is so hard to stand by and watch this process play out and know that there is very little I can do to help him, other than feed him, walk him, comfort him, and love him. My job now is to ease his way into what inevitably has to come.  Death.

Mommy Blogs...A Lifeline for Mothers

“Mommy Blogger” Lizbeth Finn-Arnold, discusses the personal, positive impact of blogging on her life as a woman and as a mother in the "Out of the Woods" passage she contributed to the book, Literary Mama: Reading for the Maternally Inclined. Blogging offered Finn-Arnold a new outlet and perspective on the role of mothering. With limited prior knowledge to the options and various mothering styles, Finn-Arnold found blogs created by other mothers to offer new perspectives on mothering, helpful recommendations, and comfort in knowing she was not alone in her experiences.

Go to American Motherhood to read more.

Review from Hormone-Colored Days

As a regular visitor to the Literary Mama Web site I was pleased to find some of my favorites like Andi's "The Plant" and Nicole Cooley's "Thirteen Ways of Looking at Being a Mother and a Poet" in a conveniently portable book. I also enjoyed some new essays like Lizbeth Finn Arnold's take on a visit to Walden Pond, "Out of the Woods". I even liked the poetry- something I never bother to read online.

Read more at Hormone-Colored Days.

Review From CarolineAndTony.com

Lizbeth Finn-Arnold’s encounter with Henry Thoreau in Out of the Woods (an essay which is inspiring some thoughtful discussion over at Midlife Mama and at ReadingWritingLiving) starts bitterly:

Thoreau may advise “Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity,” “But Thoreau wouldn’t have lasted ten minutes in his tiny cabin with my two tots.”

But a visit to Walden Pond with those rambunctious kids helps Lizbeth figure out how to create the solitude she needs to write in the midst of her chaotic life.

Review from Arch Words

Another essay that drew me in was "Out of the Woods," by Lizbeth Finn-Arnold. The author engages Thoreau's words in a dialogue that questions what his ideas about solitude can mean for a mother-writer. I could identify with her struggle to combine writing and motherhood; during Ben's first year, I found myself angry with the male writers of the past who could go into a room and close the door while someone else cared for their children. But Finn-Arnold discovers her own sense of solitude and her own voice as a writer--paradoxically by realizing "my children were my greatest inspiration...my Walden Pond... a mirror into my very own soul."

Review from Mommy Blogger

My first question is about Lizbeth Finn-Arnold’s piece, “Out of the Woods,” where she wrote about being overwhelmed by the 24/7 demands of parenting young children. ... Do you think that her sentiments are shared by other parents who may be afraid to talk about being overwhelmed for fear they’ll be labeled as “bad” parents.

Review from Mother in Chief

In her essay, Out of the Woods, Lizbeth Finn-Arnold found a way out of a nurturing rut and ultimately rediscovered herself, her interests, and her passions. She wrote: "I had become stuck in a maternal pattern of nurturing others before myself...It has become easier to reclaim some of my former self, as my children get older, become more independent, and spend more time at school. I have also learned to take the time to nourish my soul, mind, body--without feeling guilty."

Read more at Mother in Chief.

Review from Jabberlingual

From Jabberlingual: "Out of the Woods" by Lizbeth Finn-Arnold is another favorite of mine. It made me want to get out my own copy of Walden and ponder about the role of solitude (or lack thereof), writing and motherhood:

I write while there is chaos swirling around me. I write in fits and starts, between making lunches, wiping butts, getting drinks, kissing boo- boos, folding laundry, playing basketball,cleaning up broken glass, giving baths, checking homework, feeding the dog, and breaking up fights between two stubborn siblings.