"The fact is my challenges are multi-faceted. So far, we've treated my Lyme disease, co-infections, heavy metal toxicity, silicone ruptures, parasites, and viral, bacterial and fungal infections. I don't expect anyone to understand a disease so complex. I've been immersed in discovery 101--finding my way back to health. "
The above statement comes from Beverly Hills Housewife Yolanda Foster, but very well could have come from me (minus the silicone ruptures from breast implants). It makes me very emotional to watch her story unfold on the latest season of RHOBH because I do feel every bit of what she is going through. And I also understand how difficult this fight is, and how hard it is when others don't understand why you are still sick, or speculate that perhaps you are just depressed.
Guess what? You'd be depressed too if seemingly overnight you went from a vital functioning human being to a shell of your former self, who always feels sick and tired and rarely has the energy to leave your home or engage in life. It's bad enough to be sick but so much worse when you have an illness that elicits so little compassion in people.
For those who doubt what Yolanda is going through, let me assure you she is pretty much experiencing what many of us with Lyme, co-infections, parasites, and other viral, bacterial and fungal infections are feeling. I don't know why some of us can't kick this thing easily and it breaks us down and our immune systems go haywire. But it does. I suspect it has something to do with our particular genetics and viral loads. My Epstein Barr numbers are off the chart and I have a methylation defect which hinders healing. I assume the toxic loads of our modern environment, as well as hormonal issues or other issues as we age, don't help those of us whose bodies are already stressed and hypersensitive.
I hope people will watch Yolanda's story and gain an understanding about Lyme and chronic illness, and learn not to jump to conclusions or make uneducated assumptions about people's state of mind. You would never suggest a cancer patient was just depressed, so maybe you shouldn't suggest that about people suffering from chronic debilitating illnesses. It's not only rude, it's ignorant. Yes, our mental and emotional state can affect our health, but trust me when I tell you, as someone who has experienced depression, that this is different. One day I was physically fine. I was actually in hyper-drive, working on several writing projects and packing up my house for a move. Then I got what I thought was the flu, and I never recovered. And I've spent the last 2.5 years in some sort of pain for just about every minute of every day.
And no matter how many doctors I've seen, or how much I've changed my diet, or tried to exercise, or keep positive thoughts, or filtered the toxins from my body, I'm still struggling. This is an exhausting illness, and the treatments are often experimental and challenging and expensive and time-consuming, as well. Everything about it is thoroughly exhausting. There are no easy answers. No magical elixirs or pills or surgeries. I know this is hard for people to grasp, because it is complex. But trust me when I tell you it's hard for me to grasp too, but grasp I must. It is my life.
I can assure you I am not depressed (at the moment). I am working towards health and I am hopeful. But I am also frustrated and impatient. I want to get back to who I used to be.
Watching the latest episodes of RHOBH really had me fuming. The insincerity and lack of compassion is overwhelming. I know what you are thinking, what do you expect from self-absorbed shallow people living in LAlaland? The problem is I suspect a lot of ordinary people share the views of these women, and also lack compassion for Lymies. This is the kind of respect our illness gets. People like Lisa VanderPump and her doddering husband Ken can't muster sincere sympathy for Yolanda as she goes through three years of chronic pain and never-ending treatments, but do express shock to see the beauty out and about sans makeup. Oh the horror! Somebody who is sick actually looks sick!
I can guarantee you that Yolanda Foster went out without makeup because at this point in her journey, this is the least of her worries. There are weeks where I don't shower for a couple days because I can't muster the energy. If I do shower, that's it, I'll be done for the day. We pick our daily battles when we have Lyme and sometimes makeup is not in the cards. But we still want to get out for the one or two hour timeframe in which we can muster the energy to do so. Is it hard to understand that someone doesn't have the energy to put on makeup? Well, that's Lyme Disease. Yeah, it sucks that bad.
Despite what people may think, Lyme is real and debilitating, and we aren't pretending to be sick by showing up without makeup. And we aren't sick because we want attention. There are easier ways to get attention. I'm sure if given a choice, Yolanda Foster would rather be jet-setting around the world or spending quality time with her beautiful children, than sitting at home sick, swallowing endless supplements or getting chelation for mercury toxicity.
There are so many better things to do with your life than fighting chronic disease. For those of us without a choice, all we ask is for compassion, even if you can't quite wrap your silly little diamond-encrusted Beverly Hills head around it. I don't think that is too much to ask.
Comments